if only.

i really don't know...

.

be it or not.
i also don't know what i'm looking for.
afterall, i'm still alone.




---------
glad tt he's enjoying his life.
tt's whr and what he is should be like bah.
back to what he's like..
whether thr's is another or nt.
i dun have a say afterall...
thx for once being thr.
i'm trying to pick myself up.
i have to face it.
--------

OUT.

my classes are out!!!!
hmmm..
all got i know de.

but!!!
the other 2days i dun have any close friends in there... =(
one.. even worse... tt one for one whole sem we didn't tok at all de.
so...
sianx~~~

i know

i know the reason why my back is so itchy already!!!
ch8 tell mi sooo...
wahahhaa

it's pain..
it's empty.
honey corn flakes to full it up..
but i didn't get to find tt..
=(

I KNOW.

new.

i'm a little angle today!!!!

wahahaa~~
i have not being eating much today. or i can say...i never eat..
i only ate a kou ba pa...
wahahaha..
hmmm..
i just not tt hungry tot.

new experiance today.
it's really not as easy as i imgina it to be like.
grrr..
i got to buy a scoop...

i'm trying my very best in picking myself up.
cos i know it's all over...
=)

''

i will be strong.
i'm ok!
=)

maybe it's really me that makes all tt happen...
it's being a week...

.

it's good friday.

'0.0'

i'm awake!!!
yar~~
i can't sleep...
my eyes are wide opening!!!
arh~ i had not being sleeping well this few days...
i can't sleep and .. i'm feeling rather energized ...
wahahaha...

my back itch and i dunno why...grrrr...
and...as usual am tt paranoid, thinking thr's smth bitting mi...
wahahahaa...
or..
maybe is my hair tt's growing longer tt fall and itch mi??? **scratch scratch**

--i'm gg to cut my hair soon!!!!--


---------
thr's smth missing in us.
and ''i guess''...
you dun seems to know wads tt...
while i really hope tt you know and...
i really dunno. is our surrounding that is changing us or, we ourselves are really changing.
i find tt you had change, you find tt i had change. and, hah, we ourselves dun realised tt. ..
hmmm.haix. i really dunno.

what i'm waiting for don't seems to come true...
missing the past...
---------

=)

was chatting to vin just now and..
tadtah..
he show mi this real interesting website tt he had brought for his gf..
here's the link.
nice!!!

http://www.thekiss.co.jp/online/pairring2.htm

feel free to browers ard. cos the things in thr are real real nice!!!!!
=)

~.~

maybe...
perhaps...
i dunno...

ended.

guess, i will never expect you to actually say break up. I had being telling myself, as long as you say break, i will go according to it. cos, tt's also meant tt, i, have no longer any more point of holding on to it. the biggest reason i have hold on till it now is because i know you are really true towards me and give me all the trust and support even though i might be unreasonable at time. you will be still there, loving me, as who i am. the love you had given me, putting me as the top, makes me wonder that if i let go, will i be able to find another one that treat me tt well. since, you no longer so, i had no more reason to hold on to you. it just like holding to an empty shell. without knowing, yar, i had deeply fallen for you though i kept complaining and comparing and even regrated in going in this relationship. if not, i wun be crying now. no doubt, i'm really dissappointed in you. but, does tt really matter now? all my guessing or i can say feeling are right. though you deny it at first. the most aching part is not you dun love me tt much,but, is that, you actually compare the 'give' you had done in the relationship with mine. yar, true, i did complain tt you are not doing enuff. but, i didn't say things like you did not put in the effort. not matter what, i still wear, use them. i didn't comapre with what i had done just for this relationship. maybe to you, the 'giving' i had is not enuff to compare and not even a single sense to you bah. effort??? i guess i really didn't put in tt 'much'. hah. the other heartbreaking things that makes my mind set tt we are never to be again is tt, we had being arguing over and over again the same old point and view. but in the end, you dun seems or yar, you dun get wad i mean. our communication fail. but wad you tell me is, i had change, the trust and understanding in you for me is fail cause i had change. at the same time, do you know that the trust and understanding i had in you is also falling. and everytime, i mes you all those messages are just hoping that we can get a conclusion, a solution to make it better. but however, you don't see it that way. all along, i had being saying, 'complaining' this and tt to you. hoping tt i will get a better you, a better you that will understanding me more. at least the basic of what i like and what i think. And at the sametime, i hope to know you better. what you are really doing. but i guess our understanding really had reach the max. no matter how i explain to you that it fail, hoping to be better, doesn't seems to get a single point over to you.i guess you really dun understand me well enuff. i'm not a gal who will say every single thing out. love, does tt mean i need to put it in my mouth always? trust, do i have to keep saying?whatever it is, it's no longer important. today, yes, today, i will give my best to cried all out. forgetting. the sixth sense in gals, true enuff it's very true. the hug i get from you, the look, the.. feeling. i will be okie. a few more days rest. just give me few more days. i will be okie...

changes in my life again....
hmmm.
good or bad i still have to face it.
=]

...............